Monday, February 06, 2012

A Salmond Summer of Sport

Alex Salmond is not a man to stand on dignity. Despite rumours that he would restore the title of "High Excellency" to the sovereign's first minister in Scotland, it would be unfair to accuse our corpulent chief of taking himself too seriously.

So surely there must be more to the story that he accused a BBC producer of being a "gauleiter" when he refused to allow our dear leader to participate in a debate between Rugby pundits.

Personally I wasn't aware that the first minister had so much interest in the game that he could comment on the technical bravura of the Scottish loose forwards or the (alas too strong) skills of the English back line. However since we all know that Mr. Salmond has a great enthusiasm for the turf, perhaps his skill in picking horseflesh could be extended to the flowing game of Rugby (though, alas, last Saturday's game did not provide a good example).

Well, just shows how wrong can you be. I mean who knew that a First minister tipping the scales at 150 KG was actually so committed to non-equine sport? It would not have looked in any way absurd to have our Burly Brutus sitting next to the comparatively sylph-like Jeremy Guscott or Andy Nicol. Quite obviously the BBC producer must have been some kind of Nazi not to recognize that a jowly politician must be equal in rugby standing to those many capped internationalists who usually bore us with their ignorance.

So more please Alex! We are looking forward to your discussions on the off-side rule over the Euro 2012 football tournament, in which, alas Scotland will not be playing; or some exposition of javelin throwing at the Olympics. I am also quite sure that we will see you with Sue Barker discussing the niceties of Andy Murray's passing shots come Wimbledon.

An exciting summer of sport awaits with our -oh so sporty- First Minister.

On the other hand he might just be an arrogant jerk with an ego complex the size of Texas, who accused the BBC of Nazi tactics because he had lost the argument and was making a fool of himself.

Tricky one that.

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